Dr. Alan Winder · Couples conversations
Two choices give you one small conversation exercise and words you can try. No worksheet to fill out.
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Use this together only when both people feel safe to speak freely and say no. If there is intimidation, threats or violence, seek support separately rather than using a joint exercise.
Illustrative example: “Be understood” + “We get defensive”
One partner: “I’d like us to decide together before making weekend plans. Having some say in our time matters to me.”
The other: “You want us to check with each other first so you have a say. Did I understand?”
Check the meaning, then switch roles. Hearing a need does not require agreeing to a change.
All exercises · Couples mediation
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Educational exercise, not therapy, diagnosis, legal advice or emergency care. Using it does not create a professional relationship.